Why Does My Body Still Feel Unsafe When I Know I’m Safe?
This can be a confusing experience, particularly when you logically understand that there is no immediate danger but your body seems to be telling you something different.
Perhaps you feel constantly on edge. Your heart races, your muscles tense, or you find yourself scanning your surroundings for signs that something might go wrong. You might struggle to relax even when you are at home or with people you trust.
For some people, the opposite happens. Instead of feeling anxious or alert, they feel numb, disconnected, exhausted or shut down.
It can be confusing when your mind says, “There is nothing to worry about,” but your body continues to react as though there is a threat. This can happen when the nervous system has learned to respond quickly to danger or stress. Past experiences, prolonged anxiety or trauma can sometimes influence how your body responds in the present.
If this sounds familiar and you would like professional support, you can contact me to arrange a free 20-minute consultation and discuss whether therapy may be helpful for you.
Why Does My Body Feel Unsafe When There Is No Danger?
If you often wonder why your body feels unsafe, it may help to understand how the nervous system responds to perceived threat.
Our bodies have automatic systems designed to protect us. When the brain detects something that might be threatening, the body can prepare us to respond before we have consciously worked out what is happening.
You might notice:
a racing heart
rapid or shallow breathing
tightness in your chest
tense shoulders or jaw
butterflies or discomfort in your stomach
feeling restless or unable to sit still
difficulty concentrating
feeling unusually alert to sounds or movement
difficulty sleeping
feeling detached or numb
These reactions are not necessarily a sign that something dangerous is happening now.
Sometimes the body's alarm response can become particularly sensitive, meaning situations that are objectively safe can still trigger feelings of threat or discomfort.
Fight, Flight, Freeze and Shutdown Responses
You may have heard of the fight-or-flight response, but our responses to perceived threat can take several forms.
Fight might involve feeling irritable, angry, defensive or ready to confront something.
Flight can involve wanting to escape, avoiding situations or constantly keeping yourself busy.
Freeze might feel like becoming stuck, unable to think clearly or unsure what to do.
Shutdown can involve feeling numb, disconnected, exhausted or emotionally distant.
These responses can happen automatically.
Understanding them can sometimes help people move away from asking:
“What is wrong with me?”
and towards asking:
“What is my mind and body responding to right now?”
Why Understanding Your Anxiety Isn't Always Enough
One of the most frustrating experiences can be knowing that a fear is irrational while still feeling anxious.
You might tell yourself:
“I know I'm safe.”
“I know nothing bad is happening.”
“I know I shouldn't be worried.”
Yet the physical sensations continue.
This doesn't mean that therapy isn't working or that you aren't trying hard enough.
Thoughts, emotions, physical sensations and behaviours interact with one another. Changing one part of the pattern can influence the others, but sometimes it is helpful to work with several parts of the experience.
This is one reason I may integrate CBT, EMDR and somatic therapy depending on what someone is experiencing and what they would like help with.
How CBT Can Help
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) explores the relationship between our thoughts, emotions, physical sensations and behaviours.
For example, imagine noticing your heart beating quickly.
You might think:
“Something is wrong.”
That thought increases anxiety.
You begin monitoring your body more closely.
The increased attention makes you notice even more sensations, which can increase anxiety further.
CBT can help you identify these cycles and gradually change the responses that may be maintaining them.
Therapy might involve learning to respond differently to anxious thoughts, reducing avoidance, testing predictions and gradually approaching situations that have started to feel threatening.
You can read more about CBT and how I work on my website.
How EMDR May Help
Sometimes current reactions appear connected to distressing experiences from the past.
Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a psychological therapy commonly associated with the treatment of trauma and PTSD.
Rather than simply talking repeatedly about what happened, EMDR involves structured processing while using bilateral stimulation, such as guided eye movements.
The aim is to help distressing memories become less emotionally intense and reduce the extent to which past experiences continue to feel as though they are happening in the present.
You can find out more on my EMDR therapy page.
How Somatic Therapy Works With the Body
Sometimes people can explain exactly why they feel anxious but still notice strong physical reactions.
A somatic approach pays attention to what is happening within the body alongside thoughts and emotions.
For example, we might gently notice changes in breathing, muscle tension, posture, movement or physical sensations as different experiences are discussed.
The aim isn't to force the body to relax.
Instead, therapy can involve developing greater awareness of physical responses and exploring ways of responding to them without becoming overwhelmed.
You can read more about somatic therapy and how I incorporate body-based approaches into my work.
When an Integrated Approach May Be Helpful
People do not always fit neatly into one therapeutic model.
You might experience anxious thoughts that respond well to CBT while also noticing strong physical reactions connected to earlier experiences.
For this reason, I can draw upon different therapeutic approaches according to your individual difficulties and goals.
My work can integrate CBT, EMDR and trauma-informed somatic approaches rather than assuming that one approach will be appropriate for everyone.
You can read more about integrated somatic therapy with CBT and EMDR and how these approaches can complement one another.
Does Feeling Unsafe Mean I Have Trauma?
Not necessarily.
Feeling physically anxious or on edge can occur for many reasons, and experiencing these symptoms does not automatically mean that you have PTSD or unresolved trauma.
Anxiety disorders, prolonged stress, difficult life experiences and patterns of avoidance can all influence how someone feels physically.
It is also important not to assume that new or unexplained physical symptoms are caused by anxiety. If you are concerned about physical symptoms, seeking appropriate medical advice is important.
Therapy can then help explore the psychological and emotional factors that may also be contributing to how you feel.
You Don't Have to Wait Until Things Become Unmanageable
Many people continue working, caring for their families and managing everyday responsibilities while privately feeling anxious, overwhelmed or constantly on alert.
You don't have to reach a crisis point before considering therapy.
Understanding why your mind and body respond the way they do can be an important first step towards changing those patterns.
I am a BABCP Accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist providing online therapy for adults. My work includes CBT alongside EMDR and trauma-informed somatic approaches where appropriate.
If you would like to discuss what you are experiencing and whether therapy might be suitable for you, contact me to arrange a free 20-minute consultation.
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